Strawberry Apple Pancakes? What, you don’t like shrimp??? 🤪

From email Oct 25, 12:00 AM PT

Hello,

It’s me. I hope you’ve had a productive and relaxing weekend. Tomorrow is Monday and it’s back to school. The massive storm spared us. But it’s not over yet. There’s a week of much needed rain, but with each drop I miss you. Whenever it rains anymore, always I think back to sitting in my car that night so long ago, under a hail of rain, singing “No Air” with you. It was cold, but I felt so at peace. But that’s gone now, so I can’t even listen to it anymore. An earth quake destroyed the data center a couple years ago. Only fragmented memories remain. But the sight, sound, taste, and smell of heavy nighttime rain will always remind me of that night.

I have to entertain that little doubt in my head, because if I didn’t, I’d be a complete fool. There’s a big part of me that presumes
I’ll never get a response from you. For all I know, my messages are blocked or deleted, and so I’ll never know. It breaks what’s left of my heart and will. But I’m still here. On the one hand, I want to respect your privacy and space, so a simple stop would suffice. On the other hand, if I gave up that easily, then I wouldn’t have kept my promise to you to keep fighting. I’m so confused. I’m hurt. I’m broken. But I can’t help thinking I’m just emptying my heart into a void. The silence is deafening. And the tears running down my face right now can’t be expressed into words.

So anyway, tomorrow is a new day. Start off fresh and focus on your daily goals and routine. Be the best mommy you can be. And at the end of the day, just know that I’m still here, missing you, loving you, and wishing you success. I’ll celebrate with you for every accomplishment, and I’ll comfort you for every failure, and when you’re lost, I’ll pull up a map or GPS and guide you home. Or to a hotel. Or Toys R Us. Or whatever.

Whatever my nonsense, the point I’m trying to make is I love you. I believe in you and what you’re capable of. And I know you’re human, so you’ll make mistakes. At last check, I was human, too. But please don’t count me out or doubt me.

Your are the fries to my burger. And you complete me.